We have the opportunity to rehome a retired stud as a friend for Gracie. She has been here for 2 months now and has settled in well. She is very shy though and I wonder if a playmate will be good for her.

The stud is a big friendly chap who loves people, dogs and cats. He is a bit of a ladies man! The breeder told me that he sprays when he goes in the litter tray and to make sure we have an enclosed tray. My husband is worried this will smell really bad. She also warned us that he might urinate on the beds etc, so to keep him enclosed till he settles in.

I suppose I am worried about bringing someone else into the home who might make Gracie more uncomfortable. Our intention is to make her happier. Can anyone advise me on the correct way to go about this?

Thank you

Personally I wouldn't take him unless he's been neutered and has settled down after it - that should reduce the chances of him spraying, although some ex-studs do continue to urinate to mark their territory.

In terms of whether it will help Gracie, it's really hard to know. There's always the dilemma when introducing a new cat of whether you'll make things better or worse and you really can't predict it. If Gracie is very shy, my only concern would be whether a confident male might dominate her but often they're just big softies and it could go completely the other way and she might love having him around. It's a hard decision and if your hubbie isn't sure about taking an ex-stud, then maybe this isn't the right companion for Gracie at this time. Have you met him (the stud that is, not your husband )?

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Lol!!

We haven't met the stud yet. He is a bit of a drive away from us. I am worried that he might overwhelm Gracie and make her even more shy. My husband wants to get a kitten. He mentioned it a while ago and is a bit annoyed that I haven't considered that. I know I need to take his feelings into consideration too. I just thought that getting a confident friend would maybe help her.

If we decided to get a kitten would that be easier for Gracie to cope with? I really think she would like company but I don't want her to retreat further into her shell. She is so funny when she is playing and she loves chatting to herself in the mirror.

Sometimes an energetic kitten can be harder for a shy adult to adjust whereas a calm adult can be easier. Alternatively, a playful kitten can bring a shy cat out of their shell. Basically there's no simple answer

My worry from what you've said is that the male has a history of spraying and also that your hubbie doesn't seem totally happy with the idea. You both need to be 100% about whatever you do. Can you perhaps both go and visit the stud and see how both of you, and the stud, react to each other?

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Its a bummer that there is no simple answer! It would make my life so much easier.

I think travelling to see the male wouldn't be an option. It is a long drive and I might end up faling in love with him.. just for my hubby to say he doesn't want him. Its not very easy when I have one idea and he has another. Ultimately we need to work out what will be best for Gracie.

I just went up to see her and she was miaowing at me to tell me to feed her! She was talking to me last night. I went in and she was going 'kkk kkkkk kkkk', She was telling me that there is was a moth on the ceiling but not to worry because she was going to get it for me! Love her!!

I agree, you both need to be 100% together on this or the one who has doubts could end up resenting the new cat. A kitten or an adult who is placid may work out. Oscar is a placid cat and Leo takes advantage of this

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Thank you fifi. I am really looking forward to bringing a playmate or companion in for Gracie. She has taken to talking to herself in the mirror bless her!