First of all, I would NEVER EVER advise someone to have a cat loose in a car. I don't care how well behaved the cat is, a sudden stop, an accident, and something tragic could happen. A cat should always be contained in a carrier. I know there are cat owners who love posting pictures of their cat roaming free in their car. My bengal would go ballistic if I let him roam in the car. He would be under the brake pedal, on the dashboard -- not a fun experience -- and I am always reading about cats who escaped from cars from an accident, or just jumping out the open window.
Now, to the walking part. What type of harness did you get? Figure 8? Figure H? Many people here like the walking jackets, but they do cover up more of that cat and need to be custom fit to the cat.
Bella is acting like a normal cat. They do not really enjoy having something new around them. The main thing is that Bella be completely comfortable in her surroundings before you try something like this. It seems she is. Know a few things. You can keep trying to get the harness on her -- or you can eventually give up.
The harness should be easy to get on her -- ask someone to help hold her. Once you get it fastened, she will either roll over and act paralyzed or she will fight to get the jacket off. All you can do is tempt her with treats. Once a cat realizes it can walk wearing the jacket, they are usually fine. Fighting the jacket is a little harder. Try the treat thing, but if she is going ballistic, take the harness off her. Wait another day and try again. Since she seems to be easily traumatized, this may not be the best idea.
Know, too, that if you are stressed out while trying to get the harness around her, she is going to be stressed out. So both cat and owner need to be calm and maybe make it more of a game.
Most of all. PATIENCE! Now, if and when you go out on walks, be prepared for the unexpected. In the beginning, Bella won't go far. She is a female and not looking for other cats to fight with like mine does. I carry a towel with me so I can ward off dogs and cats (didn't work so well for me September 1 when Raiden got into a cat fight while on the leash. But, it also serves as a place for us to sit if Raiden just wants to be in the grass.
New York City is not really THE place to walk a cat. Lots of people, lots of cars and commotion. No grassy space. I might recommend a pet stroller. That way, you and Bella can walk to a park. If she is trained with a harness, you can then allow her to get out of the stroller while you're sitting on a park bench and she can sniff around.
I think it's wonderful you are wanting to do this for her, but remember it has to be on HER terms, not yours. Having patience helps a GREAT deal. You will get there, I just know it.
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